We are not for everyone, and that's intentional. Family coliving asks something specific from the families who join, and the wrong fit hurts everyone (the family, the other families, us). After three cohorts and a couple hundred applications, we've gotten clearer about who thrives and who doesn't.
This article is the eight questions we wish every prospective family would sit with for an evening before applying anywhere, ours or otherwise. Honest answers will save you time, money, and disappointment.
1. Are we okay sharing space with people we don't know yet?
Family coliving is not the same as a family vacation. You will eat dinner most nights with seven to ten other families. You will share a kitchen, common rooms, and outdoor areas. Your kids will integrate with other kids whether or not they want to in the first three days.
If your family relaxes by retreating into private space, this can feel intrusive. If your family tends to come alive around other people, it'll feel like coming home. Neither answer is wrong. Just know which one is yours.
2. Does our work allow real flexibility for one month?
Most parents in our cohorts are remote workers, and the days are structured to protect work blocks. But "remote" varies a lot. Can you take morning calls and afternoon-meetings only? Can you negotiate one month of slightly different hours with your team?
If your job requires constant in-person availability, late-night meetings, or last-minute travel, a cohort will be hard. We can help you assess this in the application. If your job has any flex at all, we can usually make it work.
3. Can we be honest about the messy days?
Some weeks click immediately. Other weeks, the kids clash, the parents are tired, the rhythm takes a while to find. Family coliving is not a constant-bliss experience. It is real life, in a beautiful place, with other families.
The families who do best are the ones who arrive with realistic expectations. They know there will be mornings when their kid melts down at breakfast. They know there will be a moment around day 10 when they wonder why they came. They know it'll pass.
If you're hoping for a vacation that fixes things, this won't. If you're hoping for an experience that meets you in your real life and gives you tools, it can.
4. Is our kid in a phase that fits this?
Not all kids thrive in cohort settings, even kids who normally do well in groups. Some specific things to think about:
- Toddlers (under 2): usually fine, but plan for less independent time than you might at home.
- Ages 3 to 6: often the easiest fit. They form fast friendships, the program is well-suited.
- Ages 7 to 10: typically the strongest gain from the experience. Old enough to participate fully, young enough to be open to new friendships.
- Tweens (11 to 13): harder. Some thrive. Some find the program too young or the social setup too intense.
- Teens (14+): we don't currently have a program tailored for teens. They can come, but they'll need to find their own rhythm.
- Highly sensitive kids: often do beautifully, but the first three days can be a lot. Plan a slow start.
- Kids in significant transition (recent move, parents separating, new sibling): the cohort can either help or be too much, depending. Worth a conversation before applying.
5. Can we afford it without breathing-room being a problem?
A month-long cohort represents a real cost. We've written about what it actually costs in detail. The summary: it's usually less than the alternative of a self-organized travel month, but it still costs.
If paying for it means the family is financially stressed for the next six months, please don't come. The whole experience is colored by that stress, and you won't get out of it what you came for. If it's a meaningful expense but not a financial strain, you're probably fine.
For solo parents, most cohorts have a separate, lower price point. Payment plans are available on request. We'd rather work something out than have a family overextend.
6. Are we curious about how other families do this?
The single best predictor of a family thriving in a cohort: genuine curiosity about how other families parent, work, eat, schedule, and structure their days. Not in a judgmental way. In an interested way.
If you arrive holding tightly to "how we do things," the cohort can feel grating. Other families will do things differently, and proximity makes that visible. If you arrive open to noticing what other families do well that you might want to borrow, you'll come home with ideas you'll use for years.
7. Can we be in flow with structure we didn't choose?
The daily rhythm of a Cohli cohort is set by the host, the facilitator, and the educator. Group breakfast at 8. Kids program at 9. Lunch at 12. Community time at 4. You can opt out of any of it, but the rhythm is real, and most of the value comes from being inside it.
Families who like control over their schedule sometimes find this hard at first. They want to set their own breakfast time, their own kids' rhythm, their own evening. The trade is that letting go of those decisions is part of what makes a cohort restorative. You stop running your family's logistics for a month. Someone else holds the shape.
8. Why do we want this, really?
The clearest answer we've heard: "we want our kids to grow up around other adults who care, and we want a stretch of time where the four of us are inside something bigger than ourselves." When that's the answer, the cohort delivers.
Less aligned answers: "we want a cheap way to travel," "we want a vacation that homeschools the kids for us," "we want to find a romantic partner inside a different lifestyle." None of those are mean-spirited; they're just not what a cohort is for, and the families who come for those reasons usually leave underwhelmed.
If you can't articulate why you want this beyond "it sounds nice," sit with it another week. The families who arrive with a clear answer get the most out of it.
One more honest thing: if you read these eight questions and most of your answers were "I think so?", that's not a no, it's a "talk to us first." Some families come back with clearer answers after one conversation. Others realize a different kind of family travel fits them better. Both outcomes are good outcomes.
If you're ready to talk
The application form on each cohort page is short and we read every one. You don't need to have everything figured out. You just need to be honest about where your family is, what you're hoping for, and what you're a little uncertain about.
The right fit is when both sides feel relief at the end of the conversation: us, because we know you'll thrive; you, because you know what you're walking into. We've gotten better at this part over three cohorts. We get it wrong sometimes. We're trying to get it wrong less often.
Browse the upcoming options on the cohorts section. If none of them feel right yet, the Village Post newsletter is where we share what's coming next.